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Topic Title: Lost for words (Simple Topic)

Topic starter: Calamity Jane

Topic started: 20:17:46 28th Aug 2005

Posts: 8 Last post: 00:00:05 30th Aug 2005 by swimerdude62

Calamity Jane Posted: 20:17:46 28th Aug 2005

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When was the last time you were lost for words?

About twenty years ago, a couple of friends and I were watching TV and eating fish and chips in the living room at my parents house. My father arrived back from whever he had been, came into the living room and said "Steven! You know we don't eat fish and chips in the house." First I had ever heard of this rule and kind of weird as we had had a family fish and chip supper in the same room not two weeks before. So shamefacedly my friends and I were banished to the kitchen where we had to finish our meals standing up as it was a small kitchen with no where to sit.

Three weeks ago I returned to the UK for a holiday to visit my family. On the last night of our holiday at about 10:30pm, I was sitting in the same living room with my father. Feeling a bit peckish, I said that I fancied some chips etc and remembering the incident of two decades past, asked my father if he knew of any fish and chip shops where you could sit down and eat your food. He replied that he didn't and then asked me why didn't I just bring them back to the house to eat them. Resisting the chance to drag up twenty years of bad feelings and negativity, I bit my tongue, swallowed my words and headed for the local fish and chip shop. Before I left my father gave me the keys to get back in as he was going to bed.

Twenty minutes or so later, I arrived back at the house, grabbed a plate piled it with chips, saveloy and steak and kidney pie and headed for the living room. Before I can even reach the living room door, I'm intercepted by a not-in-bed-yet old guy in a pair of baggy Y-fronts who has run down the stairs faster than his gnarly old legs should have reasonably been allowed to move. "Whats that?" he asks, "Er...pie and chips" comes a confused reply. A long and silent misgiving look on his part is followed by a roll of the eyes and a sigh of disappointment "Well ok, you can eat them here, I suppose." My eyes narrow as a sense of deja vous craps itself all over me "But I told you I was going to get chips and you said..." His head nods towards the end of the hallway "You can eat them in there" he interrupts. "...but you..." I try to continue, with a nasty suspicion that history was about to repeat itself . "But close the door to the hallway behind you, oh, and open the door to the garden". Twenty years of suppressed resentment begins to well up "...said I could eat them here you...!". He turned and headed back up to bed firing his parting shot as he reached the top of the stairs "And turn the extractor fan on as well!".

I was lost for words and by the time I had rerun the scenario at least seven times in my head and come up with that suitably devasting but all too late reply, he was fast asleep and the chips were cold.

Post yours here.




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Coce Posted: 20:22:45 28th Aug 2005

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ROFLMAO
that was the funnyest story i have heard in a long time
i dont have one yet there always tomarrow




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Moiare Posted: 21:17:24 28th Aug 2005

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That's a pretty good story. It pretty much sums up what living with my wife is like :)




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Professor Posted: 02:08:32 29th Aug 2005

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LOL




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Calamity Jane Posted: 08:18:09 29th Aug 2005

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You cant choose your family, but you can choose your wife :)




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swimerdude62 Posted: 11:54:18 29th Aug 2005

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ANd cj did well in that becouse she lets him play sl so much:P




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Calamity Jane Posted: 17:18:06 29th Aug 2005

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Sssshhh! You'll wake her up with all that shouting, and then my covers blown, I told her I was working on an international communications project, dealing with mergers and aquisitions and that I have to stay up late due to all the timezone differences :D




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Infernal Shadow Posted: 18:15:30 29th Aug 2005

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yeah these "international communications project" are a real pain keeping us all away from our families :D thank you "international communications project" i dont know what i would do without you




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swimerdude62 Posted: 00:00:05 30th Aug 2005

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ha h man and don't you know how you do it




__________________________
YAY its about time we get active
Cows. I hate cows worse than coppers.
Okay, folks, hold the applause and drop your drawers. I'm George Nelson, and I'm here to sack the city

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